ooof, man! i am beat. not as beat as some filthy dirty birds who got stuck working 17 hour days on the fourth, but beat all the same.

rolled outta bed around 7 and got a veritable crapton of work done on the website yesterday! feast your eyes on the new link to your right, which is the compilation of all sites bearing my sacred seal of approval! my dream is to have that list be millions and millions of names long, people! it's a telethon, supported by viewers like you! let's make it happen!

michelle and i ate the entire bowl of homemade god guacamole for lunch. felt a tad sick after that. too much good stuff, you know what i'm sayin? got into a fistfight with joe over just how much fireworks they had - he says we have $75 in fireworks here! and i'm like dude you guys only spent $55. you have 55 dollars worth of fireworks here. and he's all nuh-uh, look at this label! (pointing to one of two fireworks packages sitting there) it says $50 worth of fireworks for only 30 bucks!

i'm like yeah, chump, so you have $30 in fireworks sitting there! and then i punched him in the face because shut up boy, you're both right!

joe made some insane islands-worthy tropically crazy burgers for dinner - the patties were marinated in teriyucky sauce for 4 hours, and then when he put em on the grill, he put a filthy slice of swiss cheese on there and then a slice of pineapple before serving on ze bun and hot damn, you didn't even have to put ketchup or anythign on there; it was amazing.

also amazing is josh has never had white castle burgers. i bought some at the grocery store this weekend to bring the guy up to speed.

so yes! after dinner, michelle, joe, hailey, jacob, lori and yours ever so truly lit off the billions of fireworks! billions, i tells ya! every time we or one of the neighbors lit off one of those strobelighty looking ones it was the cue to begin robot dancing. also, i wish i worked at a fireworks factory, particularly in the naming department. i want SOOOOO bad to see a firework named "burning sensation". or one called "fire down below" or "if you light this firework you're a dirty slut" would be good, i think. at the end of the hour and a half long explode-a-thon, which ended with a spectacular one we call "la bomba", we still had like 4 boxes of sparklers left and hailey and jacob were still gungho but the rest of us were completely over it. so joe (in a stellar display of this weeks episode of "good things to show your kids", evening edition) put a box full of sparklers in each hand - his lovely assistant michelle (emphasis on the ass, mind you) lit em up and he demonstrated how he could draw huge circles in the air with many sparklers all at once. IT WAS AMAZING!!!

then we went inside and had brownies. even better than the millions of fireworks that were goin' off around us was going inside and having complete silence. the end!

also, please visit danielle's blog and read her july 5th entry for a wonderful example of just how freaking retarded people are. the end!