If I posted to my blog more often the entries wouldn't be so fucking long. I haven't posted in almost a week again. I had a good excuse this time, I swear, but my dog ate it.

For reals, I went back to California for the weekend, and I was too busy chasing my neice and eating tasty, tasty burgers. I originally decided on last weekend because my little sister Danielle's ska band, The Cellofaned Monkeys, was going to have their first real gig at a club in Hollywood. Unfortunately shortly after I found out about that and bought my airplane ticket, they hit a few small snags and are now in a transitional period. Among other things, they're tired of their name. You can help! You can e-mail crazy ska band names to me, post them on your own blog, or send them directly to my sister at original_slacker13@hotmail.com.

On my way to lunch with the boy Friday, I got my first speeding ticket. Yee-fuckin-haw. $165 bucks for going 17 over the limit. It's really annoying that I got a ticket for that much and was only going 42mph.

The flight back to Ca was good - the inflight movie was Spy Kids 2. I wouldn't rush out and buy it, but it wasn't bad. I never saw the first one (which by sequel law is probably way better than the one I saw), but it's funny to see these badass people Robert Rodriguez has worked with in movies like Desperado and From Dusk til Dawn act in a kooky family movie.

Being at my mom's house always brings on very noticeable changes in me. I eat ALL THE FREAKING TIME when I'm there, I get really self conscious and I always break out really bad. Her boyfriend was there, which is always annoying... it's not that I want everyone to drop what they're doing when I go back to Ca, but I'd be talking about cool stuff that's been going on in my life and in the middle of it she'll go back to talking to her boyfriend. This is my mother. It's fucking rude. She kept saying stupid shit about Ryan, she's never even met the guy... it's like being in college again. Of course because I'm seeing someone that means I'm going to stay in Wisconsin forever and become an alcoholic with fifty zillion illigitimate children and a police record 500 pages long just like everyone else in our family. Of course. (though I did just get a speeding ticket... hmm...)

I can't stand how freaking immature she is, how she still thinks that she's the only person in America that's a single mom, how she thinks that her work should be easy from now on because she's at that age where it should be fun(when in reality she's just joined the work world a couple of years ago and everyone's gotta pay their dues starting out), how she hasn't accepted that she's poor and can't afford the really expensive shit my dad used to buy her anymore... I cringe when she talks about getting a dog because she's just going to kill it anyways. I worry because while she does parenty-type things for my younger siblings she's mentally done with being a parent and bitches about it more often than not.

And that brings us to the amazing duality that is my relationship with my mom. She's not a horrible person - she has lots of emotional issues that make her do things that really piss me off but I do love her; it's just extremely hard to deal with her sometimes. On the good side she moved the date of the xmas party she was planning so we could spend some time together, and made sure everyone was around Saturday to do pseudo-christmas while I was there. And she made devilled eggs. I fucking love devilled eggs.

It was really really really really really really great seeing my bros, sistahs, neice and nephew. Hailey's getting really big and talkative, and Jacob is crawling all over the place now. He growls, too. It's funny how all of a sudden you're all typed out. The rest of my trip (short as it was) was good - ate at Jack in the Box which sucked and then ate at In and Out burger which was the exact opposite of suck. The flight back was uneventful until Chicago, where they almost escorted someone off a plane and then decided not to.

So that's my Christmas vacation. Mostly really fun with a small side order of mom issues.

Stay tuned for Wednesday night's experiment: watching the second LoTR movie with no background whatsoever. If it's too hard to follow, I can always take a 3 hour nap.