ikea, oh ikea.

i went to ikea yesterday morning at 7am. they were having a deal where if you came dressed like a present, and you were one of the first 30 people in line, you'd get a free hundred dollar giftcard. 7am seems like a stupidly late time to show up to something like this, but i was going alone and didn't want to chance being murdered in the parking lot cuz i was there all alone at 2am...

which wouldn't have happened, because apparently people started camping out at 2pm the day before. and the first thirty were there by 9pm.

when i got there, i was like number 50 in line. and i figured, hey, you're here, stick around and see what happens. i caught little bits and pieces of conversation going on around me... hopeful people coming up with ways that they'd be given gift cards, too.

"i hear it's one per household. it should be one per household."

"psst... it's 18 and older, a bunch of people brought their kids so we've still got a chance"

"hey abc news is gonna come do a story here at the costa mesa ikea!"

"i heard people got here yesterday at two... the rules say the first 30 people who show up today so they should all be disqualified..."

and then all hell kinda broke loose because all the stories started piecing together... a few people in line had been on the phone with other ikeas. and all those other ikeas were following the one per household, 18 and over rule. but this ikea decided they wanted to follow exactly what was printed on the flier that went out, which failed to mention that small print. people were in an uproar, and that's why they called the newspeople.

admittedly, it sucks. cuz i spent quite a lot of time wrapping a ghetto present for myself in tinfoil and scrawling snowflakes all over it with a sharpie and then fashioning a box-hat out of odd pieces of illustration board and putting a crapload of ribbon on the whole shebang. but i'm not gonna cry for it, argentina, cuz there's always next year and sitting in my closet my ghetto present costume will get just that much more ghetto. and that leaves more time to prepare for camping like five days in advance.

the lame thing, too, that josh and i were talking about is the people who bring their kids to stuff like this. we're going through a cold snap, people. do you really think this hunnerd dollar giftcard is worth giving your 6 month old baby pneumonia from being outside in 40 degree weather all night? look at your baby! his nose is bright red! he's crying! he looks genuinely unhappy that he's freezing his ass off! take him home! or one of you sit in the car with him! come on!

so there's that. no free furniture for me.

but i finally was able to replace the crap phone. and now i'm trying to find a good ringtone for it, and apparently good ringtones went the way of the buffalo. the magic of the ghostbusters ring on my old phone was it was cheezy and cute midi sounding music. i hate that all the ringtones i've heard this morning are fullon songs. i don't wanna hear fullon songs. i wanna hear a damn phone ring that kinda sounds vaguely like a ray parker, jr. classic! blarrrrrgh!

i did find the meowmix jingle, though, that one was kinda funny. but everything else sucks! including me! bleeeeargh!

and i hereby decree pajama day. i'm not getting dressed until it's time to get ready to go party with cops the end!