In my defense, this template made my title look the funniest.

Just kidding. I'm a sheep. moo. That's why I'm on blogger; everyone else is doing it. That's why I wear clothes, too.

It's way to early to be up on a weekendy type day. But Jed the Fish's Out of Order countdown is on early on Sundays, so it's not so bad. It's nice that there's at least one little chunk of KROQ that's syndicated. Unfortunately, Rick Dees is also played here. For some reason I can't escape that bastard.

So I had a dream this morning about my little bros and sistahs. Duh. I have those about once a week, and they're usually pretty whacked out, like the one where we met (and talked to!) Christopher Walken. This one wasn't so much fun. I was trying to get them to the Appleton airport because they'd come out to visit for a day. I was really pissed to begin with, because they had just come into town the night before, leaving us literally no time to hang before they had to leave. And we weren't at my apartment here (my dreams change venue A LOT), I think we were in my last apartment in California but that apartment was magically transported to Wisconsin. (If I was going to overanalyze the whole thing I'd say I miss my dorky roommate.) ANYWAYS, ( I ramble and use parenthesis a lot, hooray!) before I get completely off track (trains are funny) the whole dream was me being pissed off because they were only in town for a day and they had each brought a huge bag of stuff and had emptied them out on the floor, and they were trying to pack the bags, and Brittanie wouldn't leave the bathroom because she was doing her hair, and Brandon was still sleeping and Danielle and Justin were just sitting watching tv and there was an hour before their flight took off...

I woke up believing I was going to be late for the airport. By that point I was too worked up to sleep anymore, may as well get up. It makes me laugh when I sit and think about why I had the dreams I did. Yesterday, when I got home from the mall and meeting the cat I'm taking care of next weekend, Alice in Wonderland was on. There was a commercial for a toy airport. There was this cheezy kid saying things like "We just made it!" while running the people to the airplane, and "We better get our luggage!" I remember thinking (this is messed up) that when he had them running through the airport he should've said something more timely, like "Look out for terrorists!" I also got some funny cards and candy and a crazy turkey thingie in the mail yesterday from my family. I laughed for probably a half hour when I read them - nothing says we're thinking of you like "Happy Thanksgiving, motherfucker!" So there you go. Got stuff from my family, saw a commercial for a toy airport, had a messed up dream where I was pissed off at everyone. It all adds up.

Went to the mall yesterday to help Lori and Jennifer pick something out for one of the many many really cool people that are leaving b'gosh. We got Michelle this crazy toaster she fell in love with but couldn't rationalize actually spending $45 on. It's this Winnie the Poop toaster, and has pics of Poop and Tigger on the side of it. If that wasn't enough exploitation of hapless cartoon characters, it also imprints their images on the bread while it's toasting. But that's not all! It also plays music when the toast pops up. It's freaking INSANE how much stuff is built into this little toaster. So yeah, we did that. On the way home Jennifer and I had a big long conversation about how God doesn't want us to have jeans anymore. It's true! I have been trying to find a new pair of jeans for weeks - they're all either way too baggy or they do the whole suction fit thing where they go up your ass and prevent any real breathing from taking place. (no lie, I've probably tried on 60zillion pairs of pants) And they're all made from that crappy super thin crosshatchy material that'll probably fall apart within a couple of months. Last weekend while I was on the way back from getting xmas photos taken (you'll find out soon enough what I'm talking about) I had a revelation. "Wait! You sew! You could just MAKE a pair of jeans!!!" So I go to JoAnn Fabrics and buy sum fabric and go home. My sister Michelle and I (that's 5 brothers and sisters if you're keeping track) usually practice what we call Renegade Sewing. We don't preshrink the fabric, we don't iron out the pattern, we basically cut all the corners we can in preproduction to get to the fun part. Not this time, this time I tried sooooo hard to do everything right because I really need a new pair of jeans. I mean I was METICULOUS. I got to the point where I sewed one of the side seams, and when I held it up I realized oh hey, this pattern's for someone with much bigger hips than me. So I sew in farther and cut off the extra material. Hold it up, looks like it'll work. Repeat for the other leg. Sew the two together, and try them on.

I shouldn't have cut anything off. They're way too freaking small.

God doesn't want me wearing jeans anymore.

Before I go, lemme say to everyone that's already been subjected to my copy of Rejected (and its bleeding fish sticks) that there's a whole group of peeps here in Oshkosh who haven't seen it yet and really want to. It's always good fun seeing the first reactions to that cartoon.

So enough of this, I'm going to make some breakfasty type food. ("Give me your best dish stuffed with your second best dish." "Lobsters stuffed with tacos. Yes, sir.") Watching the Packer game today - and the Wisconsin assimillation begins. Should be fun. Unless it's not. Then everyone will be shot and thrown into the Fox River except for Steph because I can't kill a coworker, I'd get fired for that. And I guess I'd let her friends live, they seem cool. So no one will get shot, except maybe me for writing that. Wheeeeee!

Oh yeah, if you're reading this from the little heat-wave going on in Ca right now and you're in a short sleeve shirt and contemplating going to the beach in NOVEMBER, bite my ass.

And before I go, does anyone else have the theme song from Doogie Howser playing in their head while they write?

Really going now.

Bye.